The Incident of the Office Tie Laminator

As far as Monday mornings go, today is off to a relatively calm start. My desk was clutter-free when I came into the office. I was able to finish my morning cup of coffee before it got cold. And I even made it all the way through my inbox before 10am.

You’d think by now I would know better than to let the idea of a peaceful Monday morning cross my mind. It just doesn’t happen.

As if on cue, Aditi comes rushing through my doorway. “Grab your phone and follow me right now!” She orders, a teasing smile spreading across her lips.

 Here we go.

Smartphone in hand, I follow her into the hallway. We head straight for the copy room. This can’t be good.

We turn the corner only to see Andy hovering over a machine, looking extremely uncomfortable. Brigid is crouched to the left of him, desperately trying to let him free.

“Andy, are you okay?” I stifle a laugh.

Aditi reaches out her hand for my phone and quickly captures the moment.


“Urghh… I’m fine.” Andy says with a grimace.

“Am I the only one having flashbacks here?” I say, poking Andy in the ribs. It doesn’t feel like that long ago that we were rescuing him from the shredder. Now, here he is, laminating his tie.

“I’ve told him he should really take advantage of our casual dress code,” Brigid mumbles. “It seems that you’re just not a ‘tie guy,’ Andy.”

“Looks like it’s time for a new laminating machine. Andy, you’re really costing us a pretty penny around here,” I add, teasing him again.

“In Andy’s defense, I’ve come pretty close to laminating a few limbs of my own,” Brigid chimes in. “This machine is circa 1980.”

“Brigid’s right… I’ve avoided that machine for years,” Aditi says. “Let’s check out this month’s Office Plus Flyer for a replacement.”

“Been there, done that!” Andy calls out. “Page five, Fellowes Jupiter Laminating Machine. Comes with four heat settings, auto shut off and 19 inches per minute laminating speed. I’ve had my eye on it for weeks.”

We all laugh. Leave it to Andy. “Sounds hard to resist,” I say. “Let’s place an order.”

“But Andy? Try not to eye the new one too closely,” Brigid jokes. “You don’t exactly hold the best track record when it comes to these machines.”

Andy smiles and nods. “You got it.”

You Can Never Have Too Many Pens

I’m sitting in the boardroom at our monthly staff meeting, listening to Aditi go over our reports, when my pen suddenly runs dry.

I search frantically through my purse for a backup, trying to memorize the numbers Aditi rhymes off so I can be sure to jot them down for review.

Brigid, who is sitting in the chair across from me, slides a pen across the boardroom table and smiles warmly. I mouth the words “thank you,” and start scribbling away to catch up.

But I can’t help becoming distracted by the pen’s smooth, soft grip and archival quality. It glides across my notepad, leaving a smudge-free line of black ink behind.


Aditi’s voice trails off and everyone starts to gather up their things and head for the door. I follow closely behind Brigid, handing her pen back to her.

“Keep it,” Brigid says. “I just got a pack of 12 from the Office Plus e-flyer.”

“Thanks!” I respond. “I’m going to have to get some for myself.”

“It’s the Jimnie Gel Rollerball Pen,” Brigid tells me, pulling the flyer up on her tablet as we walk back to our offices. “You save when you buy a pack of 12.”

I glance over her shoulder as she flips through the pages, stopping her as she scrolls past images of notepads. “I’m running low on these too,” I tell her.

“I like the Recycled Perforated Pads myself,” Brigid says. “High quality legal rule on one side and blank on the other – and made with 100% recycled paper.”

“Sounds perfect!”

“I’ll email you the flyer,” she says over her shoulder as we reach my office door and she continues down the hallway.

I sit down at my desk and carefully place Brigid’s pen in my penholder. Minutes later, I hear the familiar ding coming from my laptop and Brigid’s name pops up in my inbox.

I waste no time finding the pens and pads and sending in my order. Who knew you could get so excited about note taking? I decide to purchase two boxes of 12 – just in case someone asks to “borrow” a pen at the next board meeting. It doesn’t hurt to have a backup. Plus, you can never have too many pens.

Stocking the Office Supply Cupboard with Unbeatable Value

I am putting together the final touches for my presentation, when the stapler runs out of staples.

I dig through my desk in search of replacements. “Aditi!?” I call out.

She pokes her head through my office doorway. “Yes?”

“Would you mind grabbing me another pack of staples from the office supply cupboard? I have three minutes to finish getting these handouts together for the meeting.”

“Of course.” She hurries off, only to return moments later with a troubled look on her face.

“The supply cupboard is as empty as a box of Timbits left in the lunchroom.” She says, handing over the stapler she swiped from Andy’s desk on the way by.

“Ah, shoot. Brigid was supposed to restock but she’s been home sick with Strep Throat,” I sigh, using Andy’s last staples to finish up.

“Can I ask you one for more favour, Aditi?”

“I’m all over it!” She replies, waving the May Office Plus flyer in the air.  I hadn’t even noticed it sitting on my desk. Andy must have dropped it off earlier this morning.

“Look at all of the OP Brand products featured this month,” Aditi says with excitement. “OP Foldback Clips, and Reversible File Folders. And of course OP Standard Staples – with 5000 per box!”

OP, Your Savings Brand

I scan the flyer quickly, but I don’t really need to. The OP brand is not only top quality, but it’s also unbeatable value. The flyer couldn’t have come at a better time. After dropping into the red on the Q1 budget, it’s clear we need to lower costs to improve bottom line. It was a discussion topic on the agenda for today’s quarterly meeting with the staff.

“Office Plus saves the day again,” I smile. “Let’s go ahead with the usual order.”

“With all the money we’ll save,” Aditi says, “there will be plenty leftover to buy more Timbits!”

We laugh.

You can never have too many Timbits.